Today...

Sixteen year old me would be proud of thirty-six year old me.

Click. Click. Click.

Why is it the sound of my heels clicking on the sidewalk makes me feel so very sexy???

I think not.

Is it too much to ask to be treated with love and respect? To be treated like a lady.

Thank You Mindy for sharing this with me.

Watch "MIA - Bad Girls (Official Video)" on YouTube

I can't confront you, I never could do That which might hurt you so try and be cool ...

This is one of my Favorite songs ... It reminds me of my Brother and Sister, and it 

calms me in a matter of minutes. If you play this song around me, you are sure to get a

smile .

Frozen Egg on my face.

  This will be the first weekend I will be alone. Weird. I think I will try to keep busy. Otherwise who knows what I will do. Probably sob in a corner or something silly like that. I bought two movies to watch, and I have a ton of organizing to do. I may be going out to have a drink with my Bestie on Saturday night.

  On a completely unrelated note....my Car got egged last night. WTF????  It's freezing cold out and I'm at the car wash spraying off my car. My fingers felt like they were going to freeze to the sprayer thing( yes that is a technical term.) I'm trying to not take it personally...but HELLO that is my Marshfellow....and someone has violated him. Grrr...

  There is not much to do here in the office, so I will probably leave early. Yippee?? I think??

Until next time....



                                            Hugs,
                                                  Dana Marie

All I want is the taste that your lips allow.

I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear. ~Martin Luther King, Jr.

It just takes a good friend and a little magic

The snow came today....the good snow. The magical snow. It calmed me and made my shitty day not so shitty. I am going to put on a brave face and keep it moving. My last post made it seem like I was so forlorn. I'm not. I just have moments. Reality sets in and I get scared. It's human. One of my closest friends told me to stop beating myself up over the things I have done. To forgive myself even if others haven't . Ok I'm going to try this. I have apologized. I have forgiven myself and I am moving forward. No more looking back.

I'm not Tapping out...

You Can't Start a Fire in The Pouring Rain...

So, I’m feeling down today. Like I have failed in life and no one  can tell me different.

Here is the story ….

  The story of a girl who can’t figure life out. I have finally given in. My husband and I were never really solid. I think we were thrown together in order to bring our beautiful daughter into this world.

Beyond that I have no Idea why the universe put us together. Two months ago, I put the final nail in the coffin and ended us. For Good.

 You would think this would be easy. We never get along. We have both done horrible things to each other… But it was Hard.  Really Hard.  I fell out of love a long time ago…but I do care about him, and we have a Daughter together.

  Then there is the story of how I ruined a friendship. I seriously act a fool sometimes. I think that it was

A timing thing. All of this was going on and I was super emotional. I did some things that I’m not really proud of in hind sight. I pushed him away, and he just isn’t coming back. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think about him. He was my silly silly friend who Always made me smile.

This is where I need to let him go. I have to move on without him. It kills me to have to say that… but I can’t keep reaching  something that just isn’t there.  He always said to me “ never say never”. But I think it’s time.

  Nothing really lasts forever. It’s all smoke and Mirrors. Fairy tales and nonsense. I grew up watching Romantic Comedies. The Love always wins.  I really thought that was true. I now know that just isn’t so.

The boy doesn’t always get the girl. The Happy Ending is just a dream.

  I’m a mess. No one should have to deal with the pieces that are left of me. I just wouldn’t do that to anyone. I don’t trust anymore. I am sad. I don’t believe in Love.  I don’t believe in much.

  I put on a brave face every day. I go out into the world living a lie. I pretend I’m fine. That all is well.

That I am FINE. I’m not.

  As Much as I don’t believe in Love or all that comes  with it…I long for it. I want my lobster. I want to look forward to seeing someone at the end of the day. I want the butterflies, and the awkward kisses.

I want someone to cuddle on cold nights and to walk with on warm nights. Someone who gets me.  The maze that is me. I want it. But the reality has set in… I know deep inside it is just a Dream. The reality is that it isn’t going to happen.

  The only thing I know for sure is that I will be OK at some point. I will move on, and I will be OK.

I will wake up tomorrow. The Sun will be there and the moon will be with me at night. The world will keep spinning.  My heart will heal, but the scars will still be there. The hurt will be less. The pain will be dull. I will smile again. I will breathe without hesitation. I will be OK.  I just wish I could fast forward to that part of my life. I don’t want to wish my life away….just this part.

  Thanks for listening to my rant.

    Hugs,

            Dana

Onward and upward...

Christmas  has never felt so uncomfortable and lonely.

Bug...

Monkey

Sisters

Making Christmas cookies.

Ahh...

Watch "Coldplay - Christmas Lights" on YouTube

Cramps cookies and Christmas fun.

It's the Saturday  before Christmas. There is snow on the ground. It's patchy,but it's there. I have cramps and I'm a tad grumpy. Looks like I will not be getting my Christmas wish. Sigh. I wk forge on. I will not let this break my Christmas spirit. I miss his silly face...but I've done all that I can do. Ball is in his court now.
Anywho... I'm taking Bug to Boo's house to decorate cookies. I can't wait to see Monkey and Diva. Clearly I use no ones proper name. Lol. I will post pics of the festivities later.

                        Until then...

                                Big hugs,
                                       Dana

Your with me always around me...

Only Love

OBSESSED...

 I am Completely Obsessed with this song... 

This ALWAYS gets me in the spirit...

And I think it may have done the trick again.

I LOVE... LOVE ACTUALLY!!!

I have only one Christmas wish this year...

I just want my friend back.

Tis the Season and all that Jazz...

  I'm trying my hardest to get in the Spirit... but I'm having a really hard time. 

The wonder and magic I usually feel at this time of year, just isn't there.

I'm not sure why...

Maybe it is everything that is going on in my life...

Maybe I am not taking time to just feel it.

Maybe it's just not there for me this year.

Maybe....it's because there is no snow.

Whatever the reason...it's not there, and I wish that it was.

This is one of my favorite Christmas songs...

IAMDYNAMITE

This song has been stuck in my head for two days...

At the moment I'm in love with this song. Finding it "unplugged" was the icing on the cake!

And all in an instant, everything changes. We leave the past behind and speed toward the unknown. Our future. We set out for far away places and try to find our self. Or try to lose ourselves. Exploring pleasures closer to home. The problems start when we refuse to let change happen, and cling to old habits. But if we hold on to the past too tight, the future may never come.

"The Measure of Intelligence is the ability to Change" ~ Albert Einstein

I made a huge leap almost two months ago. 

I haven't quite landed yet, but I will say this.

I now sleep better than I have in years.

I smile more than I thought possible.

I am taking care of me. 

It was a tough thing to do...

But I am better for it.